Larry Kilgore 4 Gov. of Texas - He's got serious issues

[drexel dave]

http://www.larrykilgore.com/Issues.html

[REMgirl]

Um. Uh. Hmm. Um.


YIKES!

That scares the crap outta me, and I'm not from Texas.

[the happy prole]

Yeah, but where does he stand on the environment?

[purple_octopus]

Ooh! I really like the test to find out if you're going to heaven (http://www.needgod.com/).

BTW, according to them, I'm not. Apparently, if you've ever so much as sneezed in your life, you're doomed to a fiery eternity.

[purple_octopus]

Oh jeez, guys. Don't click on the home page unless you're prepared to see photos of aborted babies. Pretty disturbing.

[Shlep]

Clearly, he has well-defined views on the major issues confronting Texans. However, I don't think the demographic that takes Chick Tracts seriously is enough to carry an election, and he's alienated pretty much everyone else.

I especially like his prediliction for addressing important issues ranging from crime to illegal immigration with flogging. It seems that in Kilgores' world, there is anything that can't be solved or at least dealt with meaningfully by whipping someone. I retract my earlier statement about the narrowness of his support; it seems he's trying to energize a base that brings people who get guidance from paranoid, bigoted little comic books and sadistic dominatrixes. Talk about building broad support! I;d not have previously imagined these two groups under the same tent.

Beyond that, I must say as I often do that I find it both amusing and troubling when I read something relating to politics or society and find myself quite unsure about whether or not what I'm reading is real or over-the-top satire. This would be one of those times. This guy makes me think of the episode of Blackadder III where Baldric gets railroaded into running for a seat on the House of Lords and one of the candidates, representing the Standing-At-The-Back- Dressed-Stupidly-And-Looking-Stupid Party, gets interviewed by a commentator:

Hannah: Has your party got any policies?

Ivor: Oh yes, certainly! We're for the compulsory serving of asparagus at break- fast, free corsets for the under-fives, and the abolition of slavery.

Hannah: Now, you see, many moderate people would respect your stand on asparagus, but what about this extremist nonsense about abolishing slavery?

Ivor: Oh, we just put that in for a joke! See you next year!

[Homsar]

find out if you're going to heaven (http://www.needgod.com/).


Does the fact that you're not going to heaven concern you? Yes or No?

I clicked No.

Well it should concern you.

Oh, I see. Well I'm not doomed, am I? There's always confession, eh?

[Shlep]

I took the test, and of course knew I was going to fail. Fortunately, the guys at the website were good enough to make sure I knew for certain where I was headed:

CORRECT: You would go to Hell

I found Larrys' bio to be most informative.

Larry's grandmother taught him the importance of memorizing Scripture.

No mention of whether meaningful interpretation and adherence to the spirit, not just the letter, of Scripture was taught. Just that he memorize them and, I guess, be able to recite them on the spot.

Larry says, "The most important decision in all my life occurred when I was five. I asked Jesus to save me from hell."

The guy was worried about Hell at age 5?

"Heaven sounded pretty cool too."

Dig it!

Larry has been involved with politics since 1988. Larry has a passion for providing freedom to others.

Unless you're gay or read skin mags, in which case Larry has a passion for flogging the shit out of you.

Larry & his wife Valerie have celebrated 16 years of marriage. They have three children ages 9, 11 & 13. They enjoy camping, canoeing, playing games, taking vacations and serving in their church.

...and flogging. Don't forget flogging!

[miami2112]

i bet this guy hangs out with the godhatesamerica.com crowd.

[miami2112]

I took the test, and of course knew I was going to fail. Fortunately, the guys at the website were good enough to make sure I knew for certain where I was headed:

i'll see you in hell.

at least there will be cool people with good taste in music.

[PunkMunky]

I'm rooting for Kinky Friedman, myself. The dude's awesome. :cool:

http://www.rapidcityjournal.com/politicalblog/wp-content/kinky.jpg

[Shlep]

i'll see you in hell.

Bring ice water, I hear it's a much-needed and rare commodity there.

at least there will be cool people with good taste in music.

I imagine the woxy circle of Hell has nonstop piped-in music with Creed, Hillary Duff, Nickelback, Avril Lavigne, Britney Spears and The Backstreet Boys in heavy rotation.

[REMgirl]

And Yanni! and John Tesh! :p

[Shlep]

And Yanni! and John Tesh! :p

Not even the Prince of Darkness is that cruel.

[miami2112]

Bring ice water, I hear it's a much-needed and rare commodity there. .

*flexing literary muscles* unless dante's inferno is the correct interpretation.



I imagine the woxy circle of Hell has nonstop piped-in music with Creed, Hillary Duff, Nickelback, Avril Lavigne, Britney Spears and The Backstreet Boys in heavy rotation.

add kidrock and that damned "save a horse ride a cowboy" song.

[drougan]

Illegal immigrants should receive a minimum punishment of five lashes, $3,000 fine & deportation.

What, no biblical justification for this particular flavor of persecution?

[bjk15]

right, and this is the figure who is trying to act like he is Jesus by saving us from our sin

http://www.larrykilgore.com/Larry.jpg

and if anyone should see one of these bumper stickers (http://www.cafepress.com/larrykilgore/968891) you should run and hide.

and the bad thing is, is that i guess i did steal from him by posting his pic here w/o permission, so clearly it is double damnation for me.

[jcarwash31]

and the bad thing is, is that i guess i did steal from him by posting his pic here w/o permission, so clearly it is double damnation for me.
Well don't bother giving money to charity, because no matter how much you give it will never make up for stealing his picture. They made it sound like I was going to hell for giving money to charity.

[agate0ph0be]

i hope i can find one of his shirts in a goodwill or something. i'd hate to give him money but i'd love to own one. i like to wear things with irony. and i love a good joke...and, well, killjoy is a really good joke.